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Attention Passengers: RoomZoom’s Guide to Considerate Commuting

By Taylor Smith

An anonymous NYC commuter went rogue last night, updating a select few of the MTA’s famous “If you see something, say something” ads with a reminder to call your representatives and the timely hashtag “resist.” While it’s not yet clear whether riders on the affected lines will heed the vigilante’s socially conscious advice, New Yorkers continue to be plainly resistant to considerate commuting practices. So, when you’re not busy calling your reps, why not apply the same spirit of civic responsibility to your daily travels? Follow these simple steps to be a better passenger.

1. It’s not that kind of pole.

The No. 1 cause of my passive-aggressive subway standoffs is passengers getting a bit too familiar with the subway poles I attempt to hold for balance. If my hand is on a pole, it should not also be pressed into your flesh. So let’s stop wrapping our entire bodies abound them as though we own them, shall we?

2. All the world’s not a stage…

I don’t think people discuss this enough. When small children trip over their growing limbs to music in an attempt to get a head start on entrepreneurship, it’s cute. When fully grown men do the same, it is disruptive and downright dangerous. The train is not big enough for your So You Think You Can Dance audition, and that show is past its peak.

3. Nor is it your shower.

Trust me, I understand needing a soundtrack for your commute other than heavy breathing and blaring train traffic announcements. Public transportation, though, is not your shower, and it’s not the club. Keep your mid-2000s hits Spotify playlist confined to your ears only. Don’t worry, your fellow commuters won’t even know what they’re missing.

4. Stand clear of the doors.

We all know them: the passengers who show off their supernatural balance by planting themselves, legs shoulder-width apart, directly in front of the car doors. Together with their fellow athletes who enter the car only to immediately stop regardless of who else may need to come or go, they unleash a special kind of hell at each stop. Business Insider christened the unpleasant phenomenon “door-bunching.” If you find yourself participating in door-bunching, you can remedy the situation with this quick, self-administered quiz: Are you getting off at the next stop? No? Then move J.

5. End manspreading once and for all.

It’s not that hard, guys. Be the change you wish to see in the world.